Oscars Red Carpet 2012——Emma Stone in Giambattista Valli

Ladies, these  colorless dresses might look great in person, but they just don’t photograph that well – especially on pale-skinned blondes. It’s a gorgeous dress and her hair and makeup look great, but we really wish there was some color to be found here.
Hit it!

Emma Stone in Giambattista Valli

Fabulous. LOVED this. One of our picks for Look of the Night.

Glenn Close in Zac Posen

Everything’s fine until you get to the bottom. The color is unusual and looks gorgeous on her and we love the idea of a tuxedo jacket with a gown, but as is usually the case with Zac Posen, way too much shit was thrown at this dress. If you took all that crap off the skirt, the look would improve dramatically.

Jane Seymour

Can’t really argue with that.
Except the matchy purse. We can argue with that.

Julia Ormond in David Meister

Dear GOD. Forget the dress; Sweetie: THAT IS NOT YOUR HAIR.

Kate Mara in Jack Guisso Couture

Pretty dress, but there’s something a little creepily doll-like with the hair and makeup.

Kristen Wiig in J. Mendel

Hair’s too casual, dress is the color of old bras. She’s so cool but she never quite gets it right.

Louise Roe

We thought this made a chic and sharp alternative to the more frivolous gowns on the RC, setting her apart as someone who’s there to do work rather than just get her picture taken. If there’s such a thing as a business-like gown, this is it. Don’t love the pseudo-Leia hair, though.

Natalie Porman in Vintage Christian Dior

Pretty.

Nina Garcia in Jean Paul Gaultier Couture

Spectacular. Nina chica, have you been working out? And by “working out” we mean that in the fashion editor sense of not eating.

Penelope Cruz in Armani Privé

Serving up Spanish Grace Kelly. Absolutely gorgeous color on her.

Berenice Bejo in Elie Saab

A very pretty color, but the proportions are off. The sleeves look heavy and make her arms look thicker and the waist sits too high. Also, the hair was bad.

Busy Philipps in Dolce & Gabbana

An okay dress let down by some poor hairstyling and shitty shoes.

Ellie Kemper in Armani Privé

Very pretty. The color looks great on her. Her booms are way too large. “Booms” are what we call oversized bangs. The ginger behind her is cute.

Sandra Bullock in Marchesa

We wanted to like this, but no. The silhouette is odd and the embellishments feel oddly placed. It looks like a t-shirt over a gown with some frippery hot-glued on to it.

Tina Fey in Carolina Herrera

Fantastic dress. It would have been nice if it was in a color because Tina defaults to the blacks and navys a little too much. It’s the hair we can’t get behind. She’s small and quirky-pretty. Grandiose hair doesn’t suit her any more than grandiose makeup would.

Wendi McLendon-Covey

Darlings, we tweeted for SIX STRAIGHT HOURS last night! And can we just say? If you tweet for 6 straight hours, your sleep cycle gets very staccato and you wind up waking up over and over again. We’re pretty sure that’s because our dreams were all only 140 characters long.